Splitzter - February 6, 2003

  There are 3 dates that burn into men’s memories each year: baseball’s opening day, the day the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue hits the newsstand and the opening Friday’s squad of the Henry County Mens Team tournament.  The Splitzter went on a road trip last Friday to check out the festivities at Hamler Lanes and to say the place was a-rockin’ doesn’t do the atmosphere justice.  All the cool guys from around the county were there… and so was Bruce Engler.  After watching some of Henry county’s finest battle the Hamler pattern, I have a few observations. Number one, I can’t wait to shoot on it this weekend.  A little more oil than what we’re used to but it would appear to be a fine tournament shot.  Even Wendell Hall found a line so how hard can it be?  Observation two, you must shoot them spares.  I saw many scores that would have been just awesome if there had been a smidgen of spare shooting between those strings of strikes.  That being said, everyone just plain had a ball.  What a party it was.  There’s nothing like getting out with your buds, quaffing a couple of root beers and shooting tournament.

            Leading the tournament after weekend one is Imbrock Pheasant Farm with a 3396 handicap score. Tim Hockman lead the Bird Boys with a 691 series with Mike Haake, Mike Imbrock, Darrell Botjer and Mike “Monk” Meyer contributing heavily.  Leading the scratch team event is Hoops Accounting #26 with a 3181 series.  While I didn’t see Imbrock’s series, I did watch the Hoopsters for  two games.  All I know is when Hoops breaks 600 and Wendell posts a 650 plus score, you know some skullduggery is happenin’.  Sunday’s squad had the only two 700’s of the tournament.  Chad “Rocket Boy” Schwaiger leads the pack with his 224-269-226-719 while teammate Bob Cannon scored his 709.

            I’m never,ever,ever going to give Karen Z a hard time about not finishing a nite out.  Mrs Zoomer saved her best for last while stroking the first 700 of the season for the county gals.  Scores of 225-215-269 gave her a sterling 709 series.  Nice shooting Mrs Z.

            Matt Buehrer did the perfecto thing for the second time this season in Wednesday’s Hernandez Insurance Classic in game three.  I’ll leave games one and two to your imagination.  Just suffice it to say that he really needed the 300 game to break 640.  Atta boy, Matthew.

            Chris Covey and Scott Helberg took a run at glory in Monday’s N R & G Recycling league.  Both boys came up one pin shy as they posted twin 299s.  There’s two ways of accepting a 299 game.  Chris, for example, started his night with the 299 and followed it with 225-171 for a 695.  This is cool.  You walk out with a smile and life is good.  Then there’s Scotty.  The only guy I know who would hit the lottery and crab because he’d owe taxes.  On this night, Scotty heard the tax man’s footsteps early.  I don’t know why he takes his weekly trip to the back to confer with Schwaig on the evening’s oil pattern.  He gets the same answer…”Just throw da’ ball, dude. It’s the same shot.”  I don’t think he was listening Monday.  The dude needs new batt-ries. A whoppin’ 162 start had our vocal hero a mumblin’.  He improved not at all in game two as he put his best game face on and beared down for a nasty 152, oooff.  Scotty, while remaining calm with just a few finger gestures, finally locked on the line. His third game 299 had the pins literally flying as his strikes were pit bangers.  Pure power.  Ummm… nice 613 Scotty. Gheesh  Another “atta-boy” goes to Shane Bofia as he shot scores of 266-237-257 for a fine 760 series that night.

            Spots are still available in both mens’ and ladies team events.  Squads are filling fast so get those entries in, bowlers.  Don’t miss out on the fun.